Thursday, January 29, 2009

The Iron Burn of Civilization!

My language arts teacher freshmen year assured me if this got published, it would totally change the way young people thought about the environment. I now know better.

Breathing Todays Air
...Breathe in....
Car exhaust,
Cigarette smoke,
A hint of rain,
The metallic taste,
The iron burn
Of Civilization.
...Breathe out...

"The Iron Burn of Civilization" should be an of Montreal cover band that rewrites the lyrics to make them environmentally friendly. Reuse, Recycle, Repair your WASTED TIME.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Advanced Proficient Humor

I have an American Government test tomorrow and while I was reading the dense and mostly un-fascinating textbook I actually found some humor. It just seemed so out of place that I thought I would share.
It's subtle but a good enough excuse for me to get out of my studies and show the world:

"...public outrage over the abuses of the spoils system, highlighted by the assassination of President James Garfield by a man always described in the history books as a 'disappointed office seeker' (lunatic would a more accurate term)..."

hear that Charles Julius Guiteau? My textbook has a bone to pick with you!

Friday, January 23, 2009

roses are read, violets just blow

Danielle has been posting old and silly poems and although I am proud to say I never wrote shitty teenage poetry before (I have three more years to actually write a TEENAGE poem, after that they will only be shitty poems.) I think my diary entries are dramatic enough without the metaphors and vague word combination (think: the sunset of my eyes carry you home). I also figured that it is in my nature to be pretty straight forward with my thoughts and writing. I hate flowery nonsense. That being said, I was shuffling through my old journals and found something close to being a poem. So for the first time in history, the second half of Might Beluga reveals the poet inside:

She sleeps with feathers in her hair and wakes to find an illegible song she scrawled in the dark the night before. If only the ideas didn't fade before the lights turned on again. "I can't keep writing in the dark and one more flash with burn out the bulb"

I actually don't think it's that bad. But that's probably because I'm an arrogant motherfucker.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

still can relate

Complete and utter garbage. But unlike some people I know, I can recognize garbage when I see it, and use it as entertainment. I don't delude myself, although my language arts teacher had circled the last three lines and wrote "Catchy!" on the side. I must agree, to be honest.

2 am
Late at night
(or is it early in the morning?)
I toss and turn.
Scenes wheel through my mind.
Forgotten places,
Forgotten faces.
None staying long enough in my mind.
These thoughts plague my mind,
Things I should've said, 
Things I should've done.
I cannot rest!
Oh how this nightly ritual
Do I detest!

Tuesday, January 13, 2009


Sometimes I think what life would be like if dinosaurs still tromped around the Earth, and I start to panic. This is an irrational fear that I have, along with being suffocated by things placed over my face (like a shirt), certain types of blankets, and my hairdresser accidentally cutting my ear off. Although, the hairdresser one is pretty legitimate. The last lady that cut my hair had this look in her eyes that was just plain malicious. She wanted blood, I just knew it, so help me god. Just like this T-Rex. Turd Rex.
Just editing this photo gave me severe shivers.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Danielle and the Deathly Sleepiness

Over the winter break, I managed to greet the day later and later. It was less like greeting and more like grumpily mumbling hello to an uninvited guest. One day I stumbled out of bed at two in the afternoon and stumbled back into bed at 8 because I was still in my pajamas and bored. Every morning, I would just rub my eyes blearily, roll over, and go back to sleep until my mother would be reduced to standing over me with a cup of ice water in her hands, yelling herself hoarse.

I begin to wonder...if no one was around to wake me up, would I just sleep and sleep FOREVER? Would I be lost in my dorm room for days that would evolve into weeks, while my traitorous body swayed in the arms of Mistress Sleep?! How long til somebody noticed I was gone?! How fucking terrible of a metaphor was swaying in the arms of Mistress Sleep?!

I picture the scene, campus police storming up the stairs, bashing the door in with their little billy clubs, the gasp that would be drawn from the mob as they laid eyes on my lifeless body, curled up in a fetal position, and the second gasp as I laboriously raised my head, passed a hand across my slitted eyes, and moaned, "Ungh...5 more minutes."

Thursday, January 1, 2009

for auld lang syne

Happy new year, friends! I hope you had a good last night, drank champagne, watched the ball drop, ate grapes and made a decent resolution. Contrary to popular belief, I am flawed. So I thought I would make a good resolution that I am capable of following. There will be many changes this year and I hope I manage to keep my head in the right place despite whatever madness I meet.
For 2009 I plan on:
Graduating High School
Attending College
Making new friends
Holding on to the old ones

and I resolve to hold on to my optimism. I am easily discouraged and easily disappointed in people. If I ever hermit away It's because I worry about how things will turn out, or I start to wonder if anyone is ever any good. This year I will try to keep my faith in myself, my future and the people around me. I know that everyone is a good person although it's not always obvious to others, and I know that everything will fall into its place no matter how badly things seem to be going...
That's all. And I apologize if this post wasn't very amusing but I thought I should share my resolution so that maybe my dear readers (and Danielle) could keep track of it.

If anyone has some good resolutions please share it with me! Even if it is to drop 15 pounds :)