In Celebration of Your Creation

Tomorrow is mallorys birthday.
I suppose the purpose of this is to say some of the things that i wouldn't exactly feel totally comfortable saying, cuz you know, I am not a sentimental person. I would rather rage and punch than hug someone dissolving into a pile of cogelating tears at my feet. I'm not proud of it.

so naturally, I feel kinda awkward saying that shes the bestest friend that i've ever had, even though that shouldn't feel awkward, and that she's one of the coolest cats in the world besides my brother. I feel silly saying that i look forward to hanging out with her, because i always know we have TWO THOUSAND POUNDS OF FUN, at LEAST, and that she has helped me out in more ways that she could probably imagine. I feel silly saying that, cuz thats super cheesy and lame. Bear with me.
She stuck by me when i sort of (blah!) ditched her for my brand-new first time boyfriend time and time again, kinda sucking it up and not ever being a huge bitch about, and in fact, never bitching about it. except in her journal, of course. but she is too polite to let me read that.

ANYWAYS. she listened to me vent about his increasing stupidity, rolled her eyes and called him a "fucking deuchebag" at the appropriate moments, and i always felt better afterwards. which is more than i can claim to have done for her. And then when we finally broke up, she was the one who made me roflcopter LITERALLY through the tears (how i hate that expression) when she gave me the awkwardest hug EVER, and we both roflcoptered at the ridiculousness of the action (she's as affectionate as a cactus. a dead one. but i say that with affection). later, she was the one who rode her bike to acme with an SNL dvd, bought me a pint of ice cream and an Elle magazine, and then rode all the way to my house in the disgusting heat, and through the disgusting highway to pop up at my house. That is pretty much one of the nicest things that anyone has ever done for me, in all sincerity.

[i fully realize that writing this does not make up for that fact that i haven't bought her a present yet. nothing...is good enough...? :) ]

I am extremely lucky, cuz she's basically the shit, and you better believe that i mean the POSITIVE CONNOTATION of shit. but man, i hope she never finds out. her ego would explode.

Happy Birthday Mallory Scandelous Nachos Morales, and thanks for the roflcopters.